Do you like the person you see when you look in the mirror? Not just the image, but the whole person? A poor self-image can sabotage your happiness, your success, and can throw cold water in your face even on days when you've accomplished something you feel good about.
Self-Improvement tactics may be able to help, but you've got to do more than just read about them.
Whatever led you to view yourself in a negative light today probably evolved over years, meaning you can't expect your self-image to improve overnight. Learning to re-frame your thoughts and habits takes time and effort, but it can be done!
The first step is questioning those negative beliefs you hold about yourself, most of which were established in childhood as the result of comments or actions by parents, teachers, and various other authority figures. In order to do that, you'll need to make a list of your core beliefs about yourself, which can be painful, but getting those beliefs out into the light is important. Seeing a belief on paper and questioning its validity can be very powerful. Are you really not smart enough? Pretty enough? Enough for who?
Understand that the people expressing those judgements about you were just stating their opinions -- not facts! Here are some useful tips for reshaping your self-image ...
- Challenge "all or nothing" thoughts that start with "I always" or "I never" (e.g. "I always screw up!")
- Remind yourself when you're doing well. (Don't wait for somebody else to tell you.)
- Treat yourself kindly. (You wouldn't be harsh with your best friend. Treat yourself with the same level of compassion and kindness.)
- Keep your statements to yourself positive. (If you say "I can" often enough, you'll start to believe it just as you've come to believe the negative things you say to yourself!)
- Stop comparing yourself to other people. Instead, focus on being the best "you" possible!
For more information on this and related topics, visit the Self-Improvement section of our blog.
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- 3 Ways to Stop Creating Problems in Your Mind